Tags: Tales from the Cul-de-sac
The hilarious antics that are witnessed in my neighborhood on a weekly basis is just to good to keep to myself and Hubby for our own entertainment. So, for you my friends I am going to let you in on my little world on the cul-de-sac, in all its entirety and hilarity.
To begin this first enstallment here is the cast of characters:
- Our neighbors to the right or the ten o’clock family on the cul-de-sac is Jan and Linda. J & L are life partners who have devoted their lives to fostering troubled adolescent boys. About a year ago they adopted one of the young boys they were fostering and have since stopped fostering to devote all of their time to being full-time Moms to this one young boy, who we will call B. He is the sweetest and kindest kid you will ever meet. He has overcome a horrific past and even though he is very introverted and shy, he is the best with Lily and Ellie and brings their dog, Jack, over to play on a regular basis.
- The family on the three o’clock slot is Peg and Jay. They are animal lovers and take in foster dogs who are in danger of being euthanized from high-kill shelters. They have four of their own dogs and usually two to three fosters at any given time. Peg and Jay have, I think, three kids. Sometimes it is hard to tell with the amount of people in and out of their home, they are the “cool parents” to their college-aged kids and they have a ton of people over all the time. Jay is the kind of guy who wears his boxers to walk his seven dogs and somehow has convinced himself that we, the other neighbors, don’t realize he is in his boxers. All the while he is smoking a cigar – always. Their home sits on approximately one acre of land. To mow his yard he uses a mid-size farm worthy John Deere tractor, it takes him all of three minutes to accomplish the mowing and a good forty-five to un-load/load the thing from the trailer and return it to his son across town. I do not see the need in that.
- Our neighbors to our left or at seven o’clock on the cul-de-sac is the, well, I don’t know what their names are because they never speak to anyone, ever. This family is a family with a husband, a wife, and two young boys. That is about all I know except for the fact that they yell, all the time. Everyday. The two little boys are, I am convinced, serial killers in training. The day I caught them trying to coax Ellie into walking into the electric fence to see her get shocked was the day I became afraid for my dog’s safety. While scary, they are also quite comical. The dad gets up early on Saturday mornings to don his two leaf blowers and blow his leaves across his grass and onto ours. He does have a third leaf blower which he straps to serial killer-in-training #2, all the while screaming at him to get moving. The only time said family ever speaks to us is when they come to the door on Halloween pretending to be the typical American normal family. None of us are fooled.
- The last family to make up our little family is, well, again, I have no idea what their names are. They are an older couple who live across the street and we never see them. When we moved here they put a cake on our front stoop. They signed it “the neighbors across the street,” therefore, we have no idea who they are. The Cake was a sweet gesture. The foot long cat whisker I pulled out of it did not say “welcome to the neighborhood” in my language. They have a front lawn that consists entirely of gravel and huge trees, so they do not even come out to mow their yard. I never see them get the mail, they come and go at precisely the same time every day and they go in their garage and close the door, never speaking to anyone. I think they are up to some shaddy business. It is just a feeling.
So, tonight I come home and serial killers in training 1 & 2 are scaling the fence of their other adjoining neighbor. I watch wondering what they could be doing. I know for a fact that they do not have a relationship with said neighbors, they literally do not talk to anyone, apparently they are too exhausted from screaming all day to talk to anyone else. I don’t want to gawk, at least where the Mom can see me, so I go through my house and onto my back deck to allow myself to see the boys without the Mom seeing me. Hey, if there is a police report that needs to be filed I am going to take these little delinquents boys down. I watch as the mother is screaming at them to come back over the fence and Serial Killer in training # 2 gets stuck on the top of the fence. The dad, sans leaf-blower, comes out to take his son off of his perch just in time to see me gawking. He says loudly, (of course) “get in the house – NOW.”
They are so up to something, but now I look like the weirdo watching their every move.
Great. I would be concerned about being pegged the neighborhood snoop, but hey, they aren’t talking to anyone, so I am good.
Stay tuned. Those little crazies are up to something and I will find out what it is!
Ed. note: All WordPress users do a hallelujah that the spell-check is in fact back and working!
Tags: Music, Six Degrees of Seperation
Sometimes it is a small world after all. The song is true. The whole concept of the Six Degrees of Separation is very intriguing to me. That is the philosophy that we are all connected in someway through six “links” of people. This theory states that if I wanted to meet the Queen of England there is a person who knows a person who knows a person who knows a person up to six people who can personally introduce me to the Queen of England. I thought the world was too big for something like that. But then I watched this Dateline NBC episode where they choose six random Martina McBride fans and challenged them to get to her for a personal introduction in six people or less.
And all of them did it! It was crazy!
I had my own slight six degrees of separation/it is a very small world moment yesterday.
Hubby and I were sitting in church waiting for the service to start when I looked down toward the front and saw a guy who resembled Jimmy Fortune of The Statler Brothers. I knew it was him immediately. My dad only gets excited for two things. 1) Auburn Football and 2) The Statler Brothers. If you don’t know who the Statler Brothers are you did not have Country Music Television in the 1980’s. They were the most popular all-men ensemble of their time and we watched their videos and listened to their music all the time.
I immediately texted my dad who was at another church across town to tell him. He was excited and it took all of my self-control not to bug him for an autograph after the service. But, I didn’t even though my dad would have loved it!
Anyway, later that night I decided to youtube some of the Statler Brothers videos to show Hubby who they were and why my dad loved them so much. The video that I remember the most vividly is the one where one of the guys gets married and all of the bridesmaids are the girlfriends of the other guys. Cute huh? I can remember what the girls wore, who was with which guy, and vaguely what they look like.
I start to watch the video OH MY GOOOOOODDD!
I recognized one of the actresses in the video! I know her personally. In college I used to be her nanny for her two little girls for years and now we go to the same church and I see her all the time.
AND SHE NEVER MENTIONED IT! Now thinking on it though, why would she?
She sang back-up for a major rock star on his world tour, won countless beauty pageants, was a cheerleader for a Super Bowl winning team for years, and was featured in the Sports Illustrated swim suit edition in her day. So why would she not mention The Statler Brothers?
It is now all in perspective. But still, it was the craziest thing, that I, as a little girl watched her in a video over and over again and years later would meet her and never know until this weekend.
I realize this is a tad bit strange, but just let me have my moment of “wow!” I realize it may not sound like a big deal, but this is a pivotal moment from my childhood which has come full circle. That is so amazing to me!
It is such a small world.
Here is the video: she is the bridesmaid who gets out of the car and is “with” the guy with the beard. If nothing else the 80’s fashions are hilarious!
- I love my new green Publix earth saving bags! I have used them at least four times and they make me so happy! Cutting down on plastic, waste, and the needed oil to produce the bags makes me smile. You can fit so much in them and they are cute to boot! Everyone should get them and use them! Do you know how many bags little the roads and kills animals every year? Not to mention that they take YEARS to biodegrade and the chemicals they leave behind are infiltrating our soil. Read all about that here. We have to do something about all the waste we are producing and it is not just plastic! Recycle people! It is not that hard. Put a “paper only” basket by your trash for junk mail that you shred and all those old papers- DON’T throw them away- Hello trees?! We also keep tubs in our garage for plastic, cardboard, and cans and aluminum. It isn’t easy, we have to drive into town to take ours, but it is for the future and it is important. You would not believe how much you throw out until you start recycling! We rarely have to take out the trash – Hubby loves that! Mom and I are seriously considering only paying for one trash pickup and paying for the recycling people to do curbside pickup. It is amazing how much less you send to the landfill. And let’s face it – it is the responsible thing to do.
- I went to clean out and vaccuum my car today. It took me forever. My dogs are never allowed in my car again, unless they are shaved bald first. I love them though.
- I am reading three books right now. I am getting confused. They are all good though.
- Pray the site hubby was working at will re-open soon, these long trecks, long days, and long hours are getting to us both.
- I still have gifts that I brought people from New York that I have not given them yet. I need to get on that.
- My friend is collecting new and gently used items for a great cause for a school in desperate need in Haiti. If you can help out let me know!
- Another friend of mine just returned from a mission trip in Cuba. I had no idea but they came home with no clothes. The whole idea was to pack so many things and leave all that they took and return home with only the clothes on thier back. The people were in such need. Her hubby was telling us the food that they are rationed each month and it was astouding. We really are so blessed in our country. I am trying hard to not complain about all of the political stuff going on. It is part of our freedom to be bombarded with the latest news of the candidates – constantly.
- We have a lot of kids in our neighboorhood. I have no idea where they all come from. There has to be at least 4 in each house. That or they come from all over town to hang out with the kids who actually live in our neighboorhood. They are everywhere.
- I again find myself with too many books. It is time to break the ties and Amazon some again. We need cashola.
- I hate basketball season. Hubby follows Duke. I could care less. It makes for long winter months.
Just a few things:
- You know it is a great song when you hear it on the radio, realize you have it on your Ipod, and yet you continue to listen to it being broadcast live . . . as was the case today when a song that was ten years old came on. Loved it, sang it, appreciated it. My pastor has a cool phrase for such a moment. Spontaneous combustion of music or something like that. It is much cooler when he says it.
- New babies are awesome . . . birth stories are not – enough said.
- Family is great – I am thankful that most of mine live close and that they are always there to help.
- I am ready to feel in the Christmas spirit. Hubby has asked four times during the past week to decorate the tree that has been in place since Saturday. I am not ready yet. I wonder what it will take? Something about a forecast of 69 degrees on Sunday does not help inch me closer to that warm fuzzy feeling. I am feeling more like a nice mix of the Grinch and E. Scrooge at the moment.
- I am excited about a trip. . . more details to come if we can actually get it done!
- I like volunteering, I wish I could do it all the time. Work is getting in the way!
- One more lesson for school is a reason to celebrate!
That is all for now. . .