For My Friend

May 23, 2008 at 4:03 pm | Posted in Thoughts | 13 Comments

Honestly, I have no idea how to express what all is going on in my head and in my heart right now. I have avoided writing “real” posts the past couple of weeks because quite honestly, I don’t want to come off negative and angry and hurt. I have avoided blogging by catching up on all of your lives and that has served as a very good distraction I must say.

I have done other things. I have been busy working. Let’s just say I have really been earning my money lately, it has been tough. I have gone for long walks and loved on my doggies and my Hubby and hung out with my fabulous family and friends. I have cleaned my house, and organized everything, and that makes me feel productive and free.

Still there is drama. There is drama that won’t go away.

First of all, I am a no drama type of girl. If I were to get a tattoo it would most likely be the words “no drama” in bold, bright letters tattooed right across my forehead. I choose to remove myself from people and events that stir up unnecessary issues. I don’t work or live well in it and I don’t tolerate it. Life is too short to get caught up in the “he said, she said” ridiculous behavior that should have been squashed with a very specific life lesson in Kindergarten. It seems that a disturbing amount of people missed that lesson and seem to thrive on the constant need to keep things stirred up in their life. I for one do not understand that and I never will. I refuse. I will remove myself from a relationship or a situation before I let you drag me down into that kind of scenario. Hence, my last three jobs. Enough said.

All that being said, someone I love has been caught up in the most ridiculous situation I have ever experienced. My friend is hurt, in pain, angry, beat-down, and being taken advantage of. I cannot even begin to go into all the details, even though they are valid and important. All I know is that my friend is trying to do something good, something honorable, and something that will change the lives of many, many people for years to come. She is a world-changer, a heroine, and a person whose heart is honorable and giving.

Yet, there is a person who continues to seek and destroy everything she does. I am not talking about a work scenario, or the “she moved my cheese,” or “she said she won’t play with me” behavior. This is a person who has openly worked to destroy her dreams and her goals, all the while costing her money, time and effort. She is now attempting to take the dream for herself all the while challenging her reputation and her characheter.

And. I. Have. Had. It.

I, myself, know this woman and it has been very hard for me to stand by and not do anything. Quite honestly, my whole group of friends has a very checkered her. She has treated us all badly. She treats everyone she comes into contact with like they are disposable, even her own children. There is no limit to her unethical and immoral behavior. I have been a first-hand witness to the behavior that she exhibits and it is hard for me to believe that such a person actually exists. It really is unlike anything I have ever seen. The stories I could tell you would make you sick, literally sick.

That is where I have been. I hate it when evil succeeds. I refuse to allow people to hurt and hinder those that I love. I just don’t know what to do about it. She may have won a battle, but she will not win the war.

To my friend who is going through such a hard time right now,

I honestly have no words for the amount of hurt and anger I feel for you right now. I only can say that I love you and I support you in all that you do and aspire to be. You are an amazing example to so many around you. You are a strong, confident, independent woman who will change this world with your desire and your passion to help and lift up people. You amaze me with your perseverance, your determination, and your desire to make a difference in the lives of those you come into contact with. You are an amazing inspiration and you deserve only the very best this world can offer you. Keep your head up, fight a good fight, and your dreams will come true. You amaze me everyday and I am so grateful to have you in my life.

We are with you.



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  1. Drama sucks. A lot. And it’s hard when you try to rid yourself of it but still see the effects of pettiness, cruelty, and ugliness.

    We are all human, but some are more wounded than others…And some handle their wounded-ness differently, namely, by taking it out on those around them.

    Prayers go out to your friend.

    She’s very blessed to have support like you.

  2. my heart goes out to you and your friend…hoping things start looking up. for every bad person out there, there are 10 good ones. just try and remember that!

  3. Toxic friends are still among the hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with. Being at an absolute loss in those situations is probably the number one way of making me feel young and naive.

  4. It is extremely hard when good people are taken advantage of by their so-called friends.

    As you know I am struggling with how the ex treated me and took advantage of me. It is extremely difficult to deal with. people like that always have excuses but excuses can only get you so far in life. There is a pt when they need to grow up!

    Hang in there!

  5. I don’t even know how to handle people who are intentionally spiteful and mean. It seems unreal and movie like. I try to see the best in people so I am sorry your friend has come up against such a bad person. Your friend will come out on top in the end. Good things happen to good people. Bad things happen to bad people. I can only hope!

  6. Oh god, that sounds awful!! I hope things get better for your friend soon – I know what it’s like to have someone just be horrible to you. (Long story short: this girl I lived with at uni stole money from everyone in our house, including charging over 400 POUNDS (about US$800!) to our other housemate’s credit card, then tried telling everyone it was me that did it! That’s the main bit anyway.)

  7. You know, I hate this kind of stuff. It’s like you said, toxic. What’s sad is that some people love to live in that mess. I wish your friend well and I hope she pulls through this other woman’s mess and comes out on top in the end.

  8. It is always hard to see the people we love in pain. Being a good friend to her will help alleviate that pain. Even if it doesn’t seem obvious to you. Hang in there.

  9. Oh no. I am very sorry that your friend, and yourself have the misfortune to have come in contact with such scum. That’s what this person is. Full Stop. I know that she will come out the end of this a better person and stronger. Please tell your friend she’s getting positive vibes from halfway around the world.

    I hate it when people think other people are nothing better than a place so step on. Even if they aren’t going anywere.


  10. I hate drama and I hate how it seem to follow me too. You’re a good person for putting it out there how you feel and what you’re going to do next in regards to her. She needs to know and now the next step is up to her.

  11. Ugh, that is awful. I hope your friend endures the mess, and comes out triumphant on the other side! Until then, keep being the supportive friend she needs.

  12. I just don’t get people like this, how they can genuinely and purposefully do something to hurt anyone else. I know I’ve hurt people in the past but never intentionally and so deeply. I hope things work themselves out, but the worst part is that there are always going to be people like this out there. I just wish they would finally all go away!

  13. Isn’t it hard to see people that wish harm on others? It is so hard to fathom feeling that way toward others. I just have to wonder what it is about them that made them that way and can’t they see that they’d be happier if they were nicer? It’s mind boggling really.

    Anyway, your friend will win the war I’m sure!

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